How to Get Sick (and Recover) in Guatemala

WARNING: This blog post contains medical information, including humorous descriptions of symptoms from a real medical disorder. Reader discretion is advised. The post is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent illness. Although, if it does - awesome! 

So, we all had a new experience this last week - amoebic dysentery. (Ok, it wasn't quite to the point of technically being dysentery, but it was close.) And, while it doesn't rate high on my list of things I'd recommend that you experience when you visit Guatemala, I think it will at least be one of the more memorable 'firsts' that we've encountered. So, in case you'd like to repeat the experience (or, maybe in case you DON'T want to repeat it), I've decided to include a step-by-step set of instructions. Without further ado, I present:

Amoebas 101

1.) Eat something. Or, drink something. Or, don't, and just touch stuff that someone else has touched. Really, there are no guarantees on this step of the process. Ameobas are very, very, very common here - both in the food and water, and on people's hands. The life cycle of amoebas makes them very easy to transmit from person-to-person. Even with the best of preventative measures (cooking things thoroughly, being careful what you drink, washing hands often) you might still end up with amoebas. Think of it as a little surprise gift from Xela to you! (How thoughtful, right?)

2.) Start feeling symptoms. Or, think you're starting to feel symptoms, but you're not sure. Or, don't, and just harbor these little suckers in your gut with you apparent side effects. Any of these are possibilities. In our case, it's likely a mix of all three. We've all struggled with <ahem> loose stools since our arrival. It's likely that we picked up amoebas sometime in the past month or two, had only a few symptoms, and managed to pass the first life cycle fairly easily. (When I speak of life cycles, by the way, let's just say it's possible to diagnose how long the amoebas have been in your gut by the presence or absence of their various manifestations. The word 'cysts' might have been thrown around in the lab report.)

Once the amoebas do start to cause symptoms, they are not pleasant ones. Severe diarrhea (up to 10 times per day), stomach cramping and aching, gas, high fever, and terrible headaches are all common... and that's just if the amoebas don't penetrate the lining the of your intestines, get into your bloodstream, and colonize in your liver. (Or BRAIN! Ewwwwwwwwww....)

3.)  Go to the doctor to get a diagnosis. This is an especially challenging thing if you don't know where to go, or what to say, since you don't speak the language. ("Un examen de heces, por favor," by the way - in case you're wondering.) This is where I am, once again, grateful to be in the embrace of a wonderful group of people who are very kind and take very good care of us. I was driven to the private hospital here in town, where I had the distinct privilege of paying 30Q (approx. $4) to give a stool sample in a urine specimen cup! I'll let the realities of that challenge remain unwritten and up to your imagination. Later the same day two other people from our family got to repeat the process. (I'm thinking this is a skill we should all include on our resumes.)

4.) Pray. (This really helped with the duration and severity of our cases!) Get medication. Again - this can be a challenge if you don't know what to say or where to go. Because lab results get emailed to you (in Spanish, of course), and there are no actual paper prescriptions, you'll once again either have to rely on the kindness of those around you, or dumb luck. (I would highly recommend the former!) Medication, though over-the-counter, is still not cheap. You should expect to pay between $50 and $75 per person for a full course of treatment. Thankfully, this is not a case where the cure is worse than the disease. The pills themselves aren't terrible, and only have to be taken three times per day for ten days. I've been told that (like most medications) it is of the utmost importance to complete a full treatment. It's bad enough to think about amoebas living in your intestines. I can't imagine having mutated amoebas to boot!

5.) Like the instructions given on shampoo bottles - lather, rinse, repeat. (Although, if you think about it, that means that we'd all be stuck in the shower forever if we followed those instructions.) Anyway - after fully recovering, you're back to step number one all over again. And, though you'll continue to do your best to wash foods carefully, watch out for what you eat and drink, and wash your hands frequently, there will still be no guarantees that you won't pick up a new batch of free-loading little amoebas who will, once again, try to colonize your intestinal tract and anything else they get access to.

The good news is that the second time around at least you'll be familiar with the process, know how to say all the necessary words in Spanish, and already be skilled at giving a sample.  ;)





 

Brain Dump

There are times when, for whatever reason, I don't have the time, focus, or ability to create an entire blog post, but there are lots of little things floating around in my head that really want to come out and play. It is for such times as these that I created the 'Brain Dump' post. Enjoy!

• Why is it that I have to duck through every doorway in my house, but the mirror in my downstairs bathroom is so high that even I (giant Gringa that I am) can only see my reflection from the nose up? 
• Is it worth taking the time to tell my phone to remember every word I type on messages and texts, or should I just continue to be content having it try to autocorrect everything I write into some random Spanish word instead? 
• There really is nothing quite like seeing a valley full of clouds from above. They look a giant, white lake, with only the highest mountain and volcano tops peeking out around the edges. Guatemala is a truly spectacular land. 
• I love that the presence of the Lord breaks language barriers. There is something immeasurably thrilling about standing in the midst of dozens and dozens of people who are crying in their own language, and I'm crying in mine, and even though we can't understand each other, we understand each other perfectly. It is at once familiar and novel every time, and I can't get enough of it. 
• I wonder when I'm going to start "feeling" like a missionary. 
• Being stared at for the color of your skin and how much you stand out is a very strange feeling. I'm not sure I like it, but I also know it's good for me, and for our family, to understand life on this side of the equation. 
• I keep mixing up the words for old (viejo) and trip (viaje). Yesterday I told my Spanish tutor that I was taking an old this morning with my students. <sigh>  He's very patient with me, and tries his best to only chuckle instead of laughing openly at my mistakes. 
• How far should one go to assimilate into one's new culture? Should I feel compelled to throw my kids big birthday parties at a local restaurant, and invite all of their classmates? Should I think about having a Quince Anos party for Rachel, even if she's not really interested in having one? Where is the line between rude and just different because of our background? 
• So, here's something strange - I buy fresh fruit from withered, ancient, Mayan women at an open market. I live and drive on literal cobblestone roads.  I hang my clothes to dry on the roof. Everyday I see people who carry things on their heads. It is no longer startling to spot cows, goats, and chickens in the road, but I do a double-take when I see a dog on a leash. These things are still hard to believe sometimes.
• Cats walking across plastic roofing in the night sound really loud. And really big. Unless, of course, there actually is a 500 pound panther walking across my skylight each night at 2:00 a.m. Could be, I suppose. Could be.
• Around here there are places called 'Auto Hotels.' Let's just say they call them that because they're places that your car goes to sleep, but <ahem> you don't. (My understanding is that they rent by the 20 minutes.) They are everywhere, and sometimes have startling American icons or logos. Like, cartoon characters, for example. I saw a billboard for one a few weeks ago that featured Chewbacca from Star Wars. Seriously, Guatemala - you never cease to amaze and confuse me. 
• Some street food smells reallllllly good. It's becoming increasingly hard to resist.  I'm beginning to think it's worth the risk of catching amoebas or accidentally eating dog meat. You only live once, right? 
• There is a kind of bread here called Pan de Muerte (bread of the dead), but I don't think it has to do wtih the Day of the Dead. (I might be wrong.) On that day people eat a cold meat and vegetable salad (of sorts) called fiambre. I'm told it's delicious. Can't wait to try it.
• I love that students have identified my room as a safe place to be, and that many of them go there to eat lunch. To hang out. To cry. To ask for prayer. God is so good.
• Every roadtrip I take (or everytime I'm in the car for more the 20 minutes, for that matter) I see someone peeing on the side of the road. There are signs up all over town admonishing people not to throw trash or use the bathroom on the sidewalks, walls, and empty lots. 
• I have yet to figure out how to write about life here in a way that really captures the beauty of this place and my genuine, pleasant wonder at it all. Somehow everything I've written sounds negative, even though I meant it just the opposite. I guess you're going to just have to believe me when I say that everything here (even the hard stuff) is a blessing and part of the place that God has truly made me love with all my heart.

A Choice

I am going to be very honest in this post.  Some people may have issues, but I am going to speak very candidly.

Last year about this time, I started to feel conviction to give something up for the Lord.  Now, I have given many things up for the Lord over the years.  I have sacrificed things I really wanted to do, or habits I enjoyed, but what He asked me to give up last year seems harder - both personally and socially.

Since August 11th of last year, I have not had any alcohol.  It is an easy date to remember, since I was at Comic-Con.  Now, this may not seem like a big deal to some. But, over the years, I had begun to enjoy the taste of alcohol.  Not to the level of getting drunk, but I liked a drink with a meal or with friends.

I compare it to not getting to eat pizza anymore (which is my favorite food).  It is easy to eat something else, but I would still miss eating it.

Alcohol had become something of a special treat for me.  When we would eat at Buffalo Wild Wings I would get a Stella Artois with my wings.  When would eat Mexican food I would get a margarita.  When going to eat somewhere nice, I would get a mixed drink I had never had before.  And on Sunday nights I would have a nice glass of Budweiser.

It was really something to enhance the meal.  It also helped me relax after a long day.

(This may be a good moment to bring up that even though I have stopped drinking, I do not view it as an evil or judge anyone who does.  This is something between me and God.  So if we are hanging out and you want to go get a drink, it will not bother me.)

Of course, I didn't listen to God at first.  (Ignoring God is especially easy when what He's asking you to give up is not something that you view as really bad.)  But, I had a heart to be obedient to what God was telling me.  And, He took matters into his own hands.

Alcohol started not tasting good. It had also lost its effect of being able to relax me.  So, I would have a Budweiser (my favorite beer) after a long day at work and the first sip would be awful.  I would think, "that is odd," and drink the rest of it over the next hour, like normal. That whole time, it would still taste awful.  AND it didn't have any relaxing effect on me.

I remember someone asking me when they offered me a drink, "Do you not drink anymore?".  My response was simply,  "It doesn’t taste good anymore."  After fighting that for a month or two  the light bulb finally came on.  God was applying pressure.

Now here is the part I like about God.

He was applying pressure. If I decided not to listen, to not have an obedient heart, or I just said that it wasn't worth giving up,  I am 99% sure that alcohol would have started tasting good again.  God will only take you as far as you are willing to go.

I have been reading Romans in the New Living Translation, and I found this idea put best in chapter 14 verse 23:

But if you have doubts about whether or not you should eat something, you are sinning if you go ahead and do it. For you are not following your convictions. If you do anything you believe is not right, you are sinning.

So, I am done drinking at this point.  I don't know if this is a forever thing, or just a season.  I would imagine God will want my obedience on this for a lifetime.  But, I am not worried about it. I am following His will for my life, and that is what counts - not the cost.

Dreams

(Platanos are like bananas, but starchier, and not as sweet. They are also delicious for breakfast when pan fried in butter, sprinkled with a little bit of suger, and then covered in heavy cream.)

I dreamed about Guatemala last night.

It was nice.

I don't usually remember my dreams, so it was an especially meaningful gift to get to wake up still smelling the fried platanos, and with the laughter of the people we met there ringing in my ears.

It makes me hungry spiritually for the experiences I know we have waiting there.

God is so good to us.